A Grand Farewell !!

Memories are what we create when we travel to new places , meet new people, eat different food, know new cultures and experience various life situations. And this is what Airforce has blessed us with. Dad had served his complete tenor with Airforce and got retired and led a graceful and independent life even after.

I remember the tag line of LIC which says “zindagi ke sath bhi aur zindagi ke baad bhi.” I don’t think dad ever took such policies but his loyalty towards his job and the integrity he lived his complete life with, has given him everything, rather more than one can think of. Along with his pension, he did have other benefits but the most important was the medical facilities for the retired that ECHS provides , which sure had taken a huge financial burden off his shoulders.

The highest honour came, When we were in deep shock by his sudden demise, Airforce association came forward informing us about the ritual. The protocol was to be followed, which we were unaware of.

When we were sadly preparing for his last rites, a bunch of Airforce personal arrived at our home in a big vehicle, carrying bouquets of flowers, a huge table, white bedsheet. These were Airmen and Officers, dressed in their ever graceful, impeccable service uniforms. They arranged the stage and Carefully placed Dad on it. The team decorated Dad with the most honourable tricoloured National Flag and offered flowers. Each of them saluted him.

We were dumbstruck, tears rolling uncontrollably. Mixed feelings, mixed emotions. In The most saddest moment we experienced utmost pride. Pride for the honour, for the respect they exhibited. The flag was Folded neatly and then handed over to Mom, along with a condolence letter signed by the highest authority and an envelop carrying some cash to cover expenses of the last rites. Unknowingly Mom saluted them and they saluted her back.

It was a grand farewell, a royal ending for the wars he participated in, for his loyalty.

Am sure DAD would have sure watched from the higher ups and would have felt extremely proud. Our respect for the Uniform Increased many folds that day.

Salute !!!

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A Smile

A famous quote says, “A curve of the smile sets everything straight.” I wonder if a smile can sort out everything. Maybe yes or maybe not. One thing is for sure, it helps to relax the face muscles, and that gives a feeling of calmness.

Let smile do the wonder till everything is set straight.

Gratitude – my way of life

Gratitude has always been my way of life. Since the time i wake up, i keep repeating the gratitude affirmations and that makes me more humble and knowing that the higher power is watching for me all the times.

Being better than many is sure a boon but that’s not the point. The point is that being better in a way that reminds me every moment that i am thankful for what i am blessed with, or i am blessed with more than i deserve.

Best of people, better opportunities, good health, abundance of prosperity and divine intervention as and when i am off track, these are sure the kind blessings one has to bow down for.

As we age, the more we realise that aging gracefully makes all the difference. Being physical fitness and mental stability comes with grace and grace comes with gratitude.

Photo by George Dolgikh on Pexels.com

Adjust and get going

Little adjustment is like normal, we all adjust knowingly or unknowingly. Frankly speaking, basic survival is not possible without adjustments. I mean, Our own body our mind our thoughts and these are the ones that take the brunt of our adjustments. we sometimes adjust because we want to, for our own happiness or comfort. Sometimes we adjust for others, specially for our near and dear ones, even if its a little difficult for us, still we do it because we want to do this. But sometimes we adjust because there is no other choice.

When we start adjusting for what ever reason, slowly we get used to the new way of living. we might resist initially, crib, cry, complain, do everything to avoid but soon we mentally prepare our selves and accept this as the way to live and over a period of time we get cosy and comfortable with this way of living. justify ourselves as everyone adjusts in one or other way, what’s big deal.

I guess a little bending is good else we become robots, but we need the awareness to know if we are bending too much and staking our identity or independence. even if we are too much bending, at some point we can sense if its wrong and then we back out.

we can not confuse forced adjustment with someone’s immorality or selfishness. these are different, however there is less doubt that a selfish person can be morally wrong and create situations that others adjust to his/her benefit, and then there are ways to deal with such people. the fools get trapped and the wise can escape.
People who adjust are loved by all, because they don’t complain but adjust to everything that comes their way. even if its done for external validation, still they are liked.

In our day to day adjustments which we get used to, changes our way of life, in long run our thought process, confidence, pride, self worth, dignity everything is compromised. At some point people who adjust more are considered as spineless, who do not stand for anything , do not like raising voice and confront. and similarly people who adjust too much see themselves as martyrs and start disliking or hating the ones who give importance to their own comforts or opinions.

i realise that based on our mood, Somedays we adjust without complaining, because we are happy internally, some days when we are upset and sad then every thing seems a challenge, we don’t want to adjust to anything, even we complain about our own body and our own way of life.
but the ones that are genuine and willingly adjust and adapt to every situation are the ones who do not make an issue of every situation, who look beyond their ego, self pride and have understood life a little more. they have seen things in a different angle, with another perspective and have known that happiness and peace is the ultimate goal, rest all are worth ignoring.

when we are on the path to peace, we have already crossed the roads of external validation and taken the simpler and easier path to inner happiness and peace. everyone has to find their own path, their own balance.

till then adjust a little and get used to it!!!

Beyond expiry and warranty

There is shelf life for most of the things, like eatables, groceries or medicines, which are supposed to be discarded after the said dates.
And there are things that do not have expiry but comes with a minimum warranty and guarantee, like electronics, however in this case we don’t have to discard but any repair after the said time is our own expense.
And we know there are things that do not have any expiry or guarantee and they are for life… a little maintenance and we are good, like gold, silver, silks, property, furniture etc.
however i wonder, do we have such date and time mentioned for humans and relationships in our life. which do not come with any guarantee or a set expiry date, how do we deal with that..

When we listen to the spiritual notes and go through scriptures, its said that every one goes through phases. nothing is accident but is designed by nature and destiny. while we buy a thing or meet a person, sickness or death, it happens only when we are destined for it. the consequence is not predictable though, because sometimes we are so much bogged down, which leaves us high and dry, where as sometimes these makes us strong and we sail easily through life.

i believe these things happen when we are moving from one phase to the other, we can not say if the effect of the thing or a person is so strong to change our destiny, but for sure any thing that happens is only to prepare us for the change. when we are to enter a certain phase of life we attract such situations and people who help us to deal with the changes that are awaiting us. Initially we are vulnerable because it shakes us off our comfort zone and then some of us gather ourselves and stand up to face the situation and win, where as some get drowned and walk to depression and darkness… i guess even that is destined too.

like a good sensible person suddenly gets into gambling and loses all the savings and gets himself into vulnerable situation, or sometimes someone believing in blind faith and getting duped to lose money or risk life .. Should we treat these as lessons to be more careful and not to take any thing, or person or situation in life for granted. maybe..

sometimes, some things happen, which are beyond our imagination and we are not
Prepared, like a theft at home, misplacing some item, or losing a job. i wonder if this also falls in the plan of our next phase preparation, where the role of that item is no more needed or it was so badly needed for someone else and we were just instrumental to cater to their need.

can it be possible to be positive and hopeful in such situations and assure ourselves that whatever happens is for our good… I don’t think its that easy, but sometimes we do not have a choice but to take it with a pinch of salt and swallow our grief and pride and accept that as a learning and realise we are entering a new phase where we need to be more cautious. because there are many things beyond our understanding which surely do not have defined expiry dates and do not come with any warranty… but they go from our lives leaving us unannounced, helpless and sad.

being cautious and humble all the times, surrendering to the plans of the higher power is the only way.. either we do it by choice or he might ensure it by force.

birthday@55

As I celebrated my birthday few days back, I know birthdays are special and it has to be… because these can be days when you do a little introspection on your birth and existence. what we are, what we did and how we progressed. Most important is to analyse if we are on the right path.

I know, Right path has no specific recipe, it would be unique for every one, as unique as they are themselves. but then one has to identify their calling and then consistently walk on it exploring new possibilities and opportunities.

however this day is always so busy, other than just thanking god for the life we got blessed with, we hardly get time to introspect…. Its also the only day when you don’t feel bad for the tons of messages and innumerable calls… wishing and checking on the plans for the day, food and party etc.

For me this year started with an amazing note… woke up at 5, finished my yoga, the complete ritual un-disturbed which was a treat in itself, after bath, puja and breakfast I got on my phone.

By that time my inbox was flooded with hundreds of messages, I was pleasantly amazed to see so many people remembering and also taking time and effort to sms. The first half went attending calls and messages from family and friends.. it was so nice talking, pumping me with excitement and energy, overwhelmed by the love and affection showered by all..

Such days are also to know that people still remember you, love you and remind you that they are just around the corner, it’s just matter of extending our hand and they are more than willing to hold, to support and stand by.

I was feeling extremely lucky and loved and wanted to stay with this feeling forever. The evening was more than excellent when a surprise party was planned by kids and my entry to kitchen was banned, felt emotional when I was treated with so much love and affection.

As the day went really well, I kept repeating my prayer humbly ..
Dear God please bless,
So I May walk on the right path,
So I May always be the reason for someone’s happiness, So I May be humble always.

Darlings!!! My point of view

While i was watching the trailer of the movie since it was released on Netflix.. but was not sure if we should watch together .. for simple reason as i understood that the subject was feminist and was highly skeptical if my husband would be interested to watch. (most of the men are uncomfortable, confronting such feminist subjects) As the cast was good hence we decided to watch it together, but as predicted after first half my husband got on a call and instantly moved out happily asking me to continue…

The first half was completely convincing as to portraying the absolute reality in many cases (is understatement… all the time is right) where the addicts of any sort are cruel and selfish even with close family members and mostly wife is the recipient of all such abuse being the closest and available all the time, considering she to be week to resist, hence empathised and sympathised. I loved the line when the police Inspector replies to the mother’s question… “Why do men behave like this with women?” Inspector says,”because you women allow it. period.” That was a very powerful statement, an eye opener.

However, I felt the movie was a little over board.. in terms of the second half as the story reverses roles in a good way, a welcome site when the victim the protagonist decides to take a stand for herself, but then it went to extremes as to kidnaping, torturing and planning to kill husband was a little over .. I understand tit for tat rule but then one doesn’t have to kill someone just to take revenge or to teach a lesson. but at the hindsight, I also felt that its justified to show as to what extend a women can go if she is rubbed the wrong side.

However the cause makes up at the end when she says …” I did all this just to get respect from him, in hope that he will change, to make him realise my pain. To show how I feel and to tell him, I have right to be treated well.” and then she accepts saying, “why do i have to look up to him to respect me”, “when I can respect myself.” Finally she leaves him and declares herself free….” if he is a scorpion, I don’t have to be a scorpion too”.. “I will be what i am and live with respect.”

Such movies are eye openers, as to what’s happening around.. Even if the women’s rights laws are in place but nothing would work till the time we teach our kids to live with self respect and to stand for themselves. And its unfortunate that the challenge prevails among all stratus, rich poor, educated uneducated, working non working, financially independent or dependent… all are equally vulnerable… women try to hide such behaviour, for guilt, or blind love or fear of physical assault, fear of society or worry of raising children…

what ever the reason till the time its not taught to every child (irrespective of boy or girl) to respect self and others equally there will be no respite. Children should be taught by example for that the parents have to behave in a better way… so its a never ending saga… but it sure pains that even after so much of awareness still most of the women are suffering…

Yesterday when my maid came .. she informed that one of her relative guy who had a failed marriage died of suicide .. that was sad… but then my maid said, that this guy was an alcoholic and used to beat his wife badly so, the wife finally left him last year and took their son along..since then this guy was asking her to come back… but she refused as she had very less hope of any change in his behaviour… and out of ego this guy committed suicide … I felt like she leaving him was at least a good move, where she understood the need to self respect…

hoping that things would change… when we know how to balance our egos, relationships while maintaining our own self respect too…

till then such movies should be made to create more awareness !!!.

Happy watching.

India @ 75

India @ 75

While we celebrated our Independence day on 15th August, this time the festive fervour was visible and felt.. like we were emotionally connected.

We all are busy in our day to day routine to remember this day as special or to realise how the freedom has been served on a plater. Mostly these event days are just an extra holidays, to wake up late, have a good meal and enjoy the day lazing on a couch, binge watching some crap.

But this year it’s special, it is India @75 celebration. It is supposed to be special. So its named as “Azadi ka Amrit Mahotsav” and to support that a campaign was launched across nation. All platforms of media were running various programs’ plays’ and awareness campaigns.

I first observed it few months back when I heard a program on Radio while I was travelling. It was a little information about a freedom fighter, who was born or died on that day and a some detail about him and his contribution followed by a patriotic song. It was cool… while I also realised that there were various slots of the day for such programs … like 3 or 4 slots a day to review and rewind the pre Independence era, by talking more about the struggles and sacrifices of the generations who laid their lives, some got popular by making a little noise to create awareness and some were less known, silently doing their bit, but making a difference.

India was mostly seen as a poor, corrupt nation, loaded with many Inter religious and Inter caste challenges. However our Image is different recently. There is a positive vibe.
Hence this year India @ 75, was time to showcase, How India got its freedom, how we sustained, how we stood up, fell down to get up again to fight, created our Image as a Strong nation.

Har Ghar Tiranga was an amazing initiative too . I was amazed to see how people welcomed the Idea and flaunted the flag by flying it over their houses, offices. It was overwhelming to see the flag every where, like the streets were painted with patriotism. Most of the cars, autos, trucks and cycles were adorning the flag with pride, giving a clear message that we love our country and we respect our flag.

while i went to buy the flag, holding it in my hand gave me goose bumps. like I was privileged of being part of this flow of energy, the enthusiasm, this ocean of emotions that’s binding this nation once again. the oneness with all was an amazing feel.

While all celebrated the day by marching the flag in streets, many programs across cities and states were conducted, patriotic songs were sung and remembering our hero’s who sacrificed their life, so we breath fearless and live with pride. I am sure most of us promised to be more humble, to be a good citizen and do our bit in building strong positive nation.

However we the humans have short memory.. we would soon forget these feelings and promises and get into our old moulds . while we got things easy hence the value of it is difficult to retain. while most of us misunderstand the freedom and expect that we should get everything free. free water, free electricity, free housing, free ration… forgetting that in this world nothing comes free, and if at all we are getting anything free then there is bound to be a dent somewhere else.

The need of the hour is Independence from our ignorance.
Hope we are blessed with the wisdom to not forget the past and have vision while moving forward to embrace the new world.

Happy Independence Day!!!.

Don’t give up

This is for me actually.

After the restart of my yoga schedule , my mind body and spirits were shattered. Depression is an understatement if i have to say. however I am daily gathering myself and getting back to the mat and trying my best to follow all the ritual with what ever limited movements my body is permitting.

Daily my prayer is Don’t give up, Don’t give up…
I have survived many challenges in the past… physical injuries and mental agonies dealing with unpleasant situations or people, but after sulking for a while, i gather myself and try my best to get back on my feet and take charge of myself. Because I might not have control over external situations but I have to have control on my mind and my body at least to say.

I constantly remind myself that I am a survivor, giving up is never an option, hence getting up and starting again with the leftover spirits and resources is what I believe in and I guess unwavering faith in God and myself had been my guiding forces.

Maybe its nothing great, That’s what everyone does. We all have that instinct, where we know that we have to do it and that’s what makes us fighters.

Just repeating “I can do it”, gives me strength and today after a week I see improvement of at least 20%, compared to my first day of start. Am sure another month of so I would be close to my basic normal self again….

Hope and faith makes us moving and I am fighting back to gain control over my pain and physical challenges… till then …

Take care and be safe!!!

Earth Day and a Rainbow

Today is Earth Day… how many of us know it and how many of us care about it.

Is’nt it a natural thing … like why at all on earth do we have to celebrate an Earth Day!!!.
Right … because we never cared, we have taken it for granted… for ages and now we have already started feeling the brunt of it.

While we ply slogans, write poems and articles in the news paper, give speeches and click photos by just handing over a plant to someone… but are we really serious and doing enough.

Now the question is if we do not know the importance of taking care of our natural resources, how will the next generation know it and unless they know, how will they work to make this earth livable.

Due to our ignorant abuse of nature we already are experiencing extreme erratic climatic conditions of heat and cold, water scarcity somewhere and floods at some other place, dust and pollution leaving us with no fresh and clean air, heavy fumes, smoke and waste from the factories being released in water or in the air. cutting trees, ruining crop producing fields to make more and more houses and factories..

While I was watching the crops being cut in the fields yesterday from our balcony, Some scarce fields amid the high rises in front of our house is a very soothing view. Amidst the heat and dusty whether, suddenly a lovely cool spell of rain gave the much needed relief. Though it was just a few drops here and there but it was cloudy which gave us feelers of being pleasant and we loved it.

While i was enjoying the weather listening to a soothing flute music sitting in the balcony, suddenly I saw a huge 180 degree rainbow… it was so beautiful that I was mesmerised by the creation of God.

Nature is so full of surprises… Or do I say Nature has not yet given up on us… or its a wake up call to take corrective action soon, before its too late or beyond repair.

I wish all of us a very happy Earth Day!!! lets try to plant one tree and take care of it till its a little big, Save water and electricity at homes … At least we can do things which are in our capacity and soon we can be contributing to make this Earth livable and breathable.

Take care and be safe!!!

Building up a routine

Building up a routine

Getting into a defined routine sometimes leads to monotony. but for us we are like dying to get into a routine, where we know at some defined time we would do a defined chore and lead a normal life.

When we moved in the new house, rather since the time we were preparing for the shifting two months back, during shifting and post shifting this complete period was like living in some other world altogether. A total mess.
There was no routine, when you get up you just start checking for things to donate, to discard, to pack, to keep for some other day. Any which ways we were occupied in so many activities leaving us with no other work but home and stuff. Some other world space altogether.

After shifting it was an other story of unpacking, arranging and rearranging…

Now slowly we started feeling like getting into a settled routine. At-least there are no more compulsive activities. Some things scattered are fine.

For anyone a routine with discipline is so important. Mind functions well and the organised way of living leads to peace and stability.

However, Am sure in just some days down the line, i would sure want some challenge and change but for now what i really need is to just settle down with a normal routine to have time to read, relax and just be.

As I get into my cosy self….

Take care and be safe!!!

Time to mend

Time to mend

Finally i decided that enough is enough.

With all josh pulled out my yoga mat from the store and moved up to the balcony. After Spreading the mat, switched on my favourite chant and went into Shavaasana… not to sleep but to relax and prepare my mind and body for the session.

After pranayama and other breathing routine when i tried stretching as if i were my normal self, non of my limbs supported. couldn’t bend, couldn’t stretch, couldn’t even sit in single asana for a few minutes, my back was jammed, calves and feet were stiff. It was a nightmare.

As much as I can remember this is the first time in my entire life when I felt like my body was giving up on me, or maybe my body was hurt for being neglected and was trying to throw tantrums. What ever it was… today’s session, though i completed huffing and puffing, but it was sure a signal that if its not mended immediately then its going to be payback time soon.

when a machine is running we take it for granted. The actual value is understood only when we are deprived of the privilege or when its broken.

Timely servicing is needed for the body or the machine so thst it’s in operational condition all the time. for that a certain discipline is needed… what I neglected till now after my injury is now so out of order. feels like, it might take many days or maybe months to get back to normal…. that too if I am consistent.

non the less… whenever you wake up that’s the right time to start. … Hence , I woke up today and hope to never ever forget this feeling of hopelessness when my own body refused to move… set back has to be accepted as a challenge, hence I would want to accept the situation and work hard to bounce back asap.

learned my lesson and hope to give the much needed attention and ensure the repair is done soon to get back to my normal self.

Till then… let’s take care and be safe!!!

Setting up the space

Setting up the Space

while we shifted into our new house a month back, but its still under settling state… Seems like, its a never ending thing.

I know its not easy, because we visualise things and get the interiors done and buy furniture and stuff accordingly, but believe me it doesn’t work that way.. its a daily chore to arrange and rearrange things for a while… every two to three days i change the setting, and my kitchen takes the maximum brunt… poor thing gets a make over daily… except the fixed things which are beyond my control.

Sometimes feels like enough of it… and want to let it be, as it is, and live peacefully .. but then there are things which are not convenient and then we start moving it again.

other than the arrangement there are other challenges like everything is new and different in the new house, so to get used to the doors from the right or left, place of the switches, drawers, cupboards, bed sides, every thing changes and it takes time to register in your subconscious mind.

though we are mentally accepting the change and getting used to the new luxury of extra space and the breadth taking view from our balcony and terrace. But as we know, with all the good things comes some challenges too, and for us its a lot of added work of cleanups …

Due to this unsettled feeling, we have not yet started inviting our guests who are really close and with whom we actually want to share our joy and space. Hope to see them soon.

We know its a little long process and i guess it would take time … meanwhile, I think I should enjoy the pleasure of the process….

Till then … Take care and be safe!!!

Ugadi 2022

As we celebrated our Telugu new year on 2nd April 2022 in our new flat, my only wish was to be blessed with abundance of love, good health, peace and prosperity.

As the ritual goes, early morning we take abhyanga snanam, (apply sesame oil to the body and wash off with a home made scrub), wear new clothes, pray god and have Uagadi Pachadi.. (a chutney with 6 flavours, sweet, sour, bitter, chilly, salty and astringent). its made with jaggary, tamarind juice, raw mango, neem flower, pepper, and a pinch of salt. this is believed to prepare us mentally for the days to come which might be flavoured with all these tastes. excess of any one thing can be overwhelming so to have a balanced year is what we wish for.

Then we are supposed to do Panchanga sravanam. Panchangam is Vedic astrology , pancha means five, so five things which are main to keep in mind in a day are tithi, nakshatra, yoga, karana and vara. based on these there are certain calculations.. (and this book is loaded with all calculations of our birth stars/ rashis’, dates of solar and lunar eclipse, do’s and don’ts , the quantity of rains, crops, heat, health challenges , wealth and other predictions) These all exists in our Vedas, calculated with precession many many years ago, the current pandits interpret and communicate to us. this is also to prepare us for the days to come, so we can take precautions if any.

In our Panchangam, every new year has a name, the way English Calander has numbers. This year is named as “Shubhakrut “. The name itself suggests well being and good luck, unlike last two years which were named Vikruti in 2020 and Plava in 2021 where the whole world went through so many challenges. So pray Shubhakrut lives up to its name.

This is not to be superstitious, but to know, that we know, before the world knows. Proud to be an Indian to live amidst this rich culture and to understand that such a knowledge exists.

New hopes are always high with festivals and celebrations, giving us strength and energy to move on. and many believe that if the first day goes well then the year too would. And mine seems to have started well. Hope it continues……

New Year Old Resolutions

New Year old resolutions

Every new year as the calendar changes, fills us up with loads of hope, motivation and some unknown excitement. As if the change of date and year will create some magic and things will suddenly be different from the very next day.

Hope is good, wishful thinking is even better… however we all know there is a need of action that will move us closer to our wishes and hopes, just wishful thinking and dreaming of good things will take us no where.

Its good to have some resolutions for health and self improvement, as we get down to make the list and sincerely try to follow for some days at least, and those some days are the key to our existence. That high of achievement, a feeling of doing something different and worthwhile helps us kill the monotony for some days. As if we were waiting for this day to walk our path or a new routine and today is the big day to start. New year but same old resolutions with a little make up to look fresh and different.

We all look forward to something that might change things to the better. may be its the new year or some festivals or some big dates of importance. the planning and the excitement makes them so promising that they fills us with hope and happiness.

All the learned and guru’s say that external motivation is short lived so look inside for that happiness, everything is inside you, but then we are mere mortals with wants and wishes… so however you might do meditations, your soul searching and being content of what we have, but such big days sure makes us more alive and aware. we are willing to put that extra effort to be a little more happy even if at the end of the day nothing much would have changed.

Such small happy events adds life to our age and refreshes our memories, some happy, some sad but what ever it is, I still would want to look forward to such days to try something different, to start a regime, to dress up, to cook a new recipe, meet people and celebrate more…

Life is nothing but a fair of small celebrations. lets make new resolutions and try our best to follow them for some days with determination and then re-plan and restart again at the next big day, because nor we are short of big days neither is our motivation.

Happy new Year to everyone !!!
May this year, we renew our old resolutions and keep up with our health and retain our happiness.